Putting Others First
I like what James Dobson has to say about putting others first. As a Christian I have heard it before and obviously failed but for some reason it really has touched my heart at this point and time. Here is what James Dobson has to say...
TWO people are not compatible simply because they love each other and are both professing Christians. Many young couples assume that the sunshine and flowers that characterized their courtship will continue for the rest of their lives. No way, Jose. It is naive to expect two unique and strong-willed individuals to mesh together like a couple of machines. Even gears have multiple cogs with rough edges to be honed before they will work in concert.
That honing process usually occurs in the first year or two of marriage. The foundation for all that is to follow is laid in those critical months. What often occurs at this time is a dramatic struggle for power in the relationship. Who will lead? Who will follow? Who will determine how the money is spent? Who will get his or her way in times of disagreement? Everything is up for grabs in the beginning, and the way these early decisions are made will set the stage for the future.
Therin lies the danger. Abraham Lincoln said, "A house divided against itself cannot stand” {See Mathew 12:25}. If both partners come into the relationship prepared to battle in those first two years, the foundation will begin to crumble. The apostle Paul gave us the divine perspective on human relationships- not only in marriage but in every dimension of life. He wrote, “Do nothing out of selfish ambition or vain conceit, but in humility consider others better than yourselves” {Philippians 2:3}.
That one verse contains more wisdom than most marriage manuals combined. If heeded, it could virtually eliminate divorce from the catalog of human experience.
TWO people are not compatible simply because they love each other and are both professing Christians. Many young couples assume that the sunshine and flowers that characterized their courtship will continue for the rest of their lives. No way, Jose. It is naive to expect two unique and strong-willed individuals to mesh together like a couple of machines. Even gears have multiple cogs with rough edges to be honed before they will work in concert.
That honing process usually occurs in the first year or two of marriage. The foundation for all that is to follow is laid in those critical months. What often occurs at this time is a dramatic struggle for power in the relationship. Who will lead? Who will follow? Who will determine how the money is spent? Who will get his or her way in times of disagreement? Everything is up for grabs in the beginning, and the way these early decisions are made will set the stage for the future.
Therin lies the danger. Abraham Lincoln said, "A house divided against itself cannot stand” {See Mathew 12:25}. If both partners come into the relationship prepared to battle in those first two years, the foundation will begin to crumble. The apostle Paul gave us the divine perspective on human relationships- not only in marriage but in every dimension of life. He wrote, “Do nothing out of selfish ambition or vain conceit, but in humility consider others better than yourselves” {Philippians 2:3}.
That one verse contains more wisdom than most marriage manuals combined. If heeded, it could virtually eliminate divorce from the catalog of human experience.
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