I Don't Have Any Friends


A couple nights ago Madalyn and I were sitting around playing Connect 4. As I was out smarting her at every turn she calmly said, "Daddy, I don't have any friends at school and no one wants to play with me."  This coming from a Kindergartner!  She didn't look at me, her tone was soft, and I sensed the sadness.  My heart was breaking inside me and I did not know what to do or say.  How could this be?  What have I done wrong?  Haven't I shown her how to make friends?  The questions kept on popping into my head and I did not have the answers to any of them. 

As we talked she started to change her story a bit and eventually had 2 - 3 friends... okay now I am feeling a little better.  I had to remember that she was at a completely new school and it would take time for her to get to the point she was at the previous daycare.  I still worry a bit but I think we are going to be okay.  I know she is going to have a lot of great friends, I just need to keep the boys away from her!

Here are some additional ideas I have come up with to help her feel connected:

-Dance lessons
-Karate lessons
-Soccer or other sport

I think she is at the point where she would greatly benefit from a class where she learns a new skill.  Any other ideas out there?


Marja said...

As a kid, my friends were mostly neighbors or people from church.

My daughter has made friends at girlscouts and school as well. Here's what I've noticed with "classes", they are in class, and there is no mingle time. There is not any extra time to sit around and chat, and parents don't stick around after class and chat amongst themselves, so the kids don't either.

Church is great because it requires the parent to visit with people which is benefitial for both parties!

Jason said...

Girlscouts... I never thought of that. I see what you mean about the class time. I think I need to try and meet some of the parents that have kids going to the same kindergarten class to set up some play dates.

Anonymous said...

Grace said that to me once and it broke my heart too, but from talking to her about it, I realized it was because she doesn't have friends over to play very often, so we've started inviting them over a little more. There's no kids in our neighborhood, and I hadn't thought of it until she mentioned it.