The Loneliness Syndrome
It has been several months now since the divorce and even more when the separation is taken into account so why is it that things don’t seem to be getting any easier? The worst is when Madalyn goes to her mom’s. I will have her all week and after 5 minutes of her being gone I am miserable. I hate not having her here, she brings the home alive and I plan my day, night, and week around her and her needs. When she is not here I feel lost with no direction. Severe ADD, focusing on any one task takes too much work. The best I can do is put a movie in and eat a pint of ice cream.
I just thought this would get easier over time and I would be able to spend the time I don’t have her working on my home business but by the time the fog or depression lifts I have wasted most of the week. Any one have any suggestions? Maybe I need therapy :-)
I just thought this would get easier over time and I would be able to spend the time I don’t have her working on my home business but by the time the fog or depression lifts I have wasted most of the week. Any one have any suggestions? Maybe I need therapy :-)
6 comments:
I have enjoyed reading your blog! It is nice to know there are actually fathers out there that do love their children. The key word is love, that is all you need!
Thanks, I do love her very much. I could not imagine not being a part of her life or seeing her less than what I do now. God has blessed me in the midst of all this uncertainty and trouble as of late.
Jason, I am a mamma-want to be, never had children, but always wished I did. So, my advice: I would seek counselling, get out to try and meet people, if your business is at home, not sure what you like, but like, country line dancing, a book group, singles group in your area, Your daughter needs you to be emotionally healthy for her. If you ever want to email me.......feel free:)
Hi Katy and thanks. I have actually been doing some counseling for the past several months. I am at the point where I think that I am going to take a break. I feel pretty good about where I am at and what I need to work on. LINE DANCING, YUCK!! hehe... I am a terrible dancer but I get your point. I have also checked into finding groups in the area and to my surprise I have ran into brick wall after brick wall. I thought there were groups for everything. If I want to live online I could find a group but locally... NOPE. I will continue to try. I know God will help me.
I know exactly what you mean. I am single dad of a 9 year girl to whom I have custody of. And just like you, I plan each day and night around my daughter's activities and when she is gone I feel very lost. The best way to explain that feeling is if my life was the solar system and my daughter was a missing sun. It was very rough when she first started seeing her mother, but now it has gotten better. What has help me alot was planning ahead before she was gone for the weekend. I try to go to the gym or simply go out to a good coffe shop, but the important thing is to try and do something away from home. I was seeing a therapist and that also helped a lot specially when guys like us do not have a significant other to share our deepest thought and feelings which MUST be let out. I wish you good luck and hope that perhaps knowing that you are not the only one feeling like that helps a bit.
Single dad, thank you so much for your encouragement and analogy. I have started doing some volunteer work at my church and going to the gym as well. At times I do like my solitude but I don't need nearly as much of it as I am getting. I think maybe I should take up reading a good book and head down to the coffee shop. I like that idea. I am glad I am not alone. I never thought I would be seeing my kid only 50% of the time. It just makes me sick to my stomach. Sometimes bitter.
Thanks again and I hope to hear from you again.
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